Today we tackle some super common negative self-talk that we ALL need to stop saying to ourselves internally and out loud.
1) I hate my ___body part___.
Stop. Please stop. You're parting yourself out and assigning a value to individual pieces of yourself. We ask others not to objectify us. We need to stop as well. If you'd like to improve your health, go for it! But don't pin your self-value on your image. It will never live up to society's standards. Doesn't feel nice to know that none of us could? We're all in the same perfectly-imperfect basket! The love you show yourself now is the same love you'll need to show yourself to get healthier. We have more to offer than our visual pleasingness. Let your image be one of the intelligent, accomplished woman tracking down her goals. And don't use this conversational crutch with other women please. We're spiraling down together.
Instead, practice gratitude towards those lovely parts. For example, instead of saying in my head, "My calves are too big," I could say to myself, "My calves are athletic and I'm so glad the carry me wherever I want to go. I can chase my child and drive a car and wear bitchin' heels!"
2) I wish my ___body part___ was like it use to be.
Please don't. Don't say it out loud (especially around your kids) and do your best to change your thought patterns about your body. Imagine if your best friend said the same thing, or your child. Wouldn't it break your heart? These are usually areas of our body that have worked hard for us and given back way more than they could ever contribute if they stayed how they were. Also, wouldn't it hurt to hear someone complain about their legs if yours couldn't carry you? Wouldn't it hurt to hear someone complain about their mummy tummy if they could never conceive?
Gratitude is the answer for this one as well. It's the only way to stop this train of thought. Example: "Though my tummy isn't as flat as it used to be, I'm so grateful to have had the chance to carry my children."
3) I have nothing to wear. I hate everything in my closet!!!
Stahp! You know you do, it just it's buried in a sea of eye clutter in your closet. Repeating this to yourself over and over just digs this trench in your head that will make you shop out of desperation instead of out of joy or at the very least necessity. You're setting yourself up for closet stress here. If nothing fits, you dislike the majority of it, haven't worn it in 2+years, it's broken, or just sentimental, it's time to let it go or store it out of sight. Go here to learn how to do that!
One last fix for all three of these is employing others in the fight against negative self-talk. Don't engage in mocking people's bodies, don't engage in the chatter about body parts your friends hate, and ask your friend or partner to stop you if you start.
Remember! If you wouldn't want your child or best friend to say it about themselves, stop.